those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
We just watched planet earth in marine bio. And our prof told us that was all we were doing on 420
I couldn't tell if those girls from the bar were lesbians or just awesome
She handed me a mouthguard and said "here, you're going to need this" that rough.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
okay, please tell me Cammy is the one who put the picture and note on my desk saying "beat off to this homeboy"
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
It's one of those days where you order the free Papa John's pizza so the delivery guy can bring you Coke to go with your rum. The tip was more than the order.
We got kicked out of Walmart for playing cod with squirt guns of course it was better then prom.
What's the right thing to say when he sends me a picture of his penis ?
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
Randomize
