his facebook status quotes britney spears so there is always that
my little brother got his license today.. too early to ask him to DD?
between my moustache and how drunk I am it will be a miracle if I get laid tonight.
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
Sketchest drug deal yet.... I just got paid in quarters and chucky chesse tokens. I need to stop hooking my friends up.
Desperately trying not to throw up over the side of the ferry back to CT. Can't be the first one of the season.
I'm not sure what happened last night but I woke up next to him and I was wearing nothing but my grandpa's diabetic socks, so I'm letting that fill in the blanks.
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
She forgot a bra so she just used seran wrap. The scary thing is, it worked.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
It's not even noon and I've had 3 people call me a savage, one of them said it in reference to the blow job I gave them. So I guess you could say it's going to be a good weekend
I kept screaming that he looked like Khal Drogo and rode around the bar on his back.
If my body were a person, it would be beating the shit out of me for what I did to it last night.
Had a dream last night where I asked you how your Christmas was and your response was, “sex, man. Just lots and lots of sex.”
Good god. A spell so dry your friends actually commit it to their subconscious!
Randomize