gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I just remembered yelling "they're gonna let me be a lawyer! Me! Why would they do that?"
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
nah i think i'm gonna take my landlord's kids trick-or-treating instead. apparently the houses around here hand out wine to the adults and candy to the kids.
That was like me applying to a law school drunk at 5 am
Hahaha. That's funny.
But I got an 18k dollar per year scholarship
I think animal control just caught me smoking a bowl on the back porch. Do they have any say in this matter?? Haha
Almost just bought a peacock. I need to get off Craigslist
He said "I can't wait for you to feel me inside of you so I can tell you gently that you're mine" and left me a 4 minute voice mail of him crying after I told him I didn't want to be with him. 30 year olds are off limits.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
You spent the entire night trying to get me to make out with you
yeah I remember. your boyfriend shouldnt have cheered me on though.
Longest 30 seconds of my life
10/10 so not recommended
Randomize
