you guys were way drunker than both of me
i'm watching degrassi (go figure) and the episode is about jimmy not being able to get a boner and now he's famous and rapping about popping pussies..i dont get it.
I woke up this morning to 4 booty call texts. So i am trying to find the sign that says i like to sit on cocks so that i can take it off.
trust me, i wonder where that sign is on a daily basis.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
every time i get drunk at her place i end up leaving with nothing but an empty box of toaster strudels..
The ratio of how much he pisses me off to how much sex i get just isnt working out for me
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
My roommate didn't flush after her miscarriage. Time to drink myself blind. I need you for moral support. Or so I don't have to drunkenly cry alone anymore. Whatever, help.
Whoever put the rooster in the elevator is my fucking hero. Who even thinks of that shit?
God, please protect all woman from micro-penises
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
I may have taken the entire adderall. I FEEL LIKE THE FUCKIN HULK. I can't stop cleaning and organizing and doing the clean things
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
We smell like vodka and hangover
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