Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Bring enough bail money and little extra for tacos after
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
I have banged to "The Emperor's New Groove" way more than could possibly be reasonable.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Tonight I'm getting fucked up for America because Lord knows we need it.
I have a vagina. So i automatically win.
Randomize
