You know that bakery that Sandra Bullock's sister owns?
The one in Montpelier?
yeah, well it doesn't exist anymore. VT's one fucking claim to fame closed.
i dont care that its taken 20 hrs to pee without hurting, BEST HATE SEX EVER.
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
I was born in the year of the cock... How fitting.
Just kicked a guy in his penis in order to win a dance contest on Bourbon....desperate.
There's a certain level of slut that i can handle.... I think she just broke that scale
Why was there a 1000 piece puzzle covered in hot sauce being cooked in the microwave?
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
You were drunk it couldn't have been that bad
I've never been drunk enough to enjoy getting a blister on my dick.
Oddly enough I feel totally fine now. Clonazapam and red bull the breakfast of champions.
how come you came home with "Amanda owns this" written on your forhead
The last thing I need is a possessed urethra.
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
Randomize
