Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
Is it wrong that im more embaressed about the karoke than the toplessness?
My mother's day gift to my mother is to promise never to tell her 95% of the stories I've accumulated in my life.
forced to watch US open for father's day. only perk is discovering dustin johnson...reeeeally hoping that this golf sex addiction thing is contagious
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
The 30 seconds of sex was almost worth it...I mean he did smoke me out and watched the princess and the frog with me
And she was like "I wanted you all for myself, to love you, and treat you like gold."... See this is why I shouldn't fuck Italian chicks...
some people offered us free beer as long as we shotgunned it and after you shotgunned four without pausing they took their offer back
I am in fact going to raffle myself off for a night. If you are interested in buying a ticket let me know. $10 a ticket.
But I swear to god if I'm awkwardly there while you try to have sex with someone again I'm getting high with your dad
Look on the bright side: Now that I'm sleeping with both the exs it's good bye to drunk sexting the 'wrong one'.
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
I have photo proof.
Girl, don't care. What's my rule? If I don't remember it, it never happened.
I feel like I'm a car that keeps getting Bacardi 151 instead of fuel
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
