If she sees it and stops hooking up w/ me then you owe me
ugh, today is just one of those 'get high before your 8am class' days.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
So i guess i slapped the girl sitting next to me leg and said "You know what they say, got fat legs...you gotta fat BOX"
He asked if he could fuck me while on chat roulette.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
My only regret is that we didn't pee on our neighbors Prius
Omg, looked at my call history, and judging by the times of calls it took me like half hour to walk home frommcds
i know you're at the dentist, but this dick pic was too phenominal to wait and i deserve immediate tit compensation
So you drank bourbon with cough syrup?
I still had a cough. It only makes sense
why is there a wheelchair in the hall and why does it look like we banged in it?
got a free grilled cheese. Didn't even have to talk about Jesus
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
I just had mom give me advice about how and where to store my lube in my shower. It was super awkward. Of course, she also walked in on me masturbating once so I guess turnabout is fair play
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