her teeth looked like a whores toenails, i was too horrified to
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
Just assessed the damage in the bath. Two love bites. One bruise on the inner thigh. Strange awareness of what i'm assuming is my cervix. I've definitely missed you. x
You know summer is almost over when ur school booty calls start hitting u up as if solidifying their spot in drunken mistakes for next semester
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
YOU ARE THE WORST TRAVEL AGENT! THIS IS A SINGLES CRUSE FOR SENIORS. THEY ALL THINK IM THE FUCKING WAITRESS JUST CAUSE IM BLACK!!!
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
We're ordering chinese food so if you want to get on this obesity train answer me now.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
All I remember is receiving a lap dance to slow motion.
Because you hugged a homeless guy, and I paid him 5 bucks to give us our giraffe balloon animal back. That's why.
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
He's smoked my weed, stolen my cigarettes, and used my campus cash, but I try to initiate sex and NOWWW he's all "As your RA, that's a line I can't cross"
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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