Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
The reason halloween exists is because it's not cheating if you're wearing a costume.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
we were hooking up and then he goes "you can touch my penis" and i laughed too hard to do anything. no second date.
Pretty sure I sang "What Makes You Beautiful" to some random guy in a parking lot last night...
Dude, you kicked in the door to get to a six-person orgy while yelling "I JUST WANT TO LEARN!!"
I maxed out my credit card last night on powdered donuts and beef jerky
The awkward moment when a lady ask you what kind of lipliner you're using, but really I have just finished eating hot cheetos.
the cuervo was good, but I started with jello shots. and when i threw up a whole jello shot came out.
Randomize