so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
well most of my day revolves around power hour
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I tried to explain to him that we just wanted a stereotypical black friend to be in our group. He didn't take it too well... Never take me to the bar again.
When I came in she was screaming "boundaries!" at the cat because it was trying to eat her pizza rolls.
The goblet must only be used for good. And vodka. And anything t-pain would be proud of.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
You told me that you were mad me because I wouldn't let you 'explore my castle'. Then you said I smelled like a hospital and passed out.
He sat next to me, put his arm around me, yelled at his girlfriend that he was breaking up with her, and told me I'm his little pet for the night.
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
Randomize