OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
just bought a $25 eighth from a chick who has a kid. i'm helping my community out right?
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
I just realized i came back home with my lei that one night. How do i forget my bra but remember my lei?
I think I reached optimum potential when I summersaulted straight into a kiddie pool.
No, earlier you attempted Jenga with everyones shoes.
Found half of a five day old piece of pizza behind my dresser. Apparently it was drunkenly set there and got knocked down. It was such a happy reminder of last weekend.
I found a cheeseburger next to my tub once. It's there to shame you, but it always just makes me feel more awesome.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
Is it considered a bad morning to find your boss half naked in the parking lot of work at 7am?
That depends, how hot is your boss?
I was just lying down, dumping goldfish into my mouth and they like all came out I thought I was going to choke and die and people would be like damn that's so sad, she died laying in bed stuffing her face and reading kanye wests twitter, damn.
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I was too hungover to sit up and pull the curtains closed so I did it with my toes
How's the party?
I'm watching two people get flogged. Sothere's that.
Randomize
