careful when you do the walk of shame, they are handing out bibles on campus
she makes me feel like im THAT guy in the taylor swift song
me and this guy in my office just exchanged an "i saw you at a drag show last night" look as he passed by my desk.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
Yea there's blood all over the porch but we wont have to buy alcohol for the rest of the week
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
This is a mass text. First one to reply gets head.
Before anyone claims this, this chick is in my boyfriend's phone as "Worst BJ EVER!"
Does that mean you're calling dibs or can I?
He told me we were going to a cabin. It's just logs and a tarp made into walls. This night can go either way at this point.
Last I saw, they went for a smoke and only one came back. He passed out outside. I'm glad he's only 120lbs. I left him on the rug still. My mom is gonna be pissed.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I think him and kristen are pretty serious now.. I dont think he cheats on her, anymore.
sometimes u just gotta ride a dildo and forget about life
Randomize
