dude she licked ball and has every Are you afraid of the dark episode on dvd
lock that shit down
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Someone shat in the 1st floor west girls hall. Literally SHAT in the hallway
That's what she gets for taking his peeps.
This is a drunk text message. I am so glad that we are friends. Tomorrow we will eat sandwiches in miniature. We both love dogs. Flower.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
I hate that he uses me for something other than sex. What does he think I am? His girlfriend? Ha.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
Also. This Ativan makes me feel fearless. I think we need an exciting new hobby for when we take it. How do you feel about ghost hunting?
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
Also I stopped in the middle of the road and put my hazards on because BUNNIES WERE PLAYING
And for the record I didn't even have sex last night. I threw up in his toilet and slept in his bed until noon
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
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