So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
i just bought weed at the top of a mountain, best decision of our lives to go to school in colorado.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
Dude, I'm importing a boy from Oklahoma for my divorce party. It's like doctors without borders, but with dicks.
No amount of marijuana is enough to justify blood on my ceiling
Every time he asks me if I'm horny I'm just like come on...stupid question
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
The party was Hollywood themed and I won an oscar for "finest ass in a leading role"
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
I want a musical about memes.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
there is puke in my bra ... again
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