Christians are straight up FREAKS
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
you said you couldnt let go of the fence because your hand was molding to it.
Just so you know, I'm standing in my bra eating cereal. My keys were in the cereal box.
We probably shouldn't have forced that guys cat to drink the grey goose while we were doing lines in his bathroom
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
So if you ever need to know a guy who knows a guy who knows a guy that can put a 24oz beer can up his ass... Hit me up...
I look like a zombie and smell like a stripper. Its gonna be a good day.
High enough to ask the woman at best buy if she ever feels like she's swimming. and telling the man outside that he smells like happy juice.
And I'd make him talk dirty to me. In Forrest Gump's voice.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
MY TITS ARE PERFECTLY CALM.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Does sending her to the conference instead of a competent employee and putting her in a suite make up for banging her husband behind her back?
No, but she’ll have a nice memory when she gets dumped and fired on the same day.
Randomize
