Grossest hangover story of 09: Puked in the bathtub. I was in it.
I texted him about a book we both like. I was expecting a "ya great book... let's bone" response. It didn't work
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
when i asked what day 420 fell on this year, she answered so quickly i knew i found my soulmate.
the general consensus of people in the room is that i should have another bottle of wine.
"people in the room" being me.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
Didn't want you to think it had been open season on my vagina since we broke up.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
We're too hungover to prance.
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
Do you know how fucking great a bath bomb is when you're high?
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
I am listening to my ipod while i puke, this is most entertaining hangover i have ever had.
Let me atleast have my coffee before you start talking about your penis
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