That's your vagina. No one goes out and burns it
What's the politest way to tell someone that you're only interested in them when they're naked, and even then it's just like a passing "meh?"
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
you were convinced campus grass and foliage would give you your daily serving of vegetables to balance out the amount of alcohol you drank.
Did you see the soccer ref give that girl the red card as she was being kicked out of the party?
isnt it sad that we can reminisce about our childhood but we cant remember shit we did last month
Hurry up and get here. I already announced to the bar that you were on a mission to get laid tonight. I have 3 takers.
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
AT THIS RATE YOU WILL HAVE FUCKED MORE OF MY CLOSE FRIENDS THAN I HAVE PEOPLE PERIOD BY VALENTINE'S DAY.
There was a selfie of you in the dark pointing at the camera with a duck face. You sent it to my 60 year old mother with the caption "you behave"
Checked my photo vault today... My self nudie folder is passing the 150 mark.
The weird thing is that you don't send them to anyone. You just keep them for yourself...
Hey. Make all the seamen/semen jokes you want. Not many people can say they fucked 2 different girls in two different countries in one week on a tax free bonus. Next up: Italy.
I may or may not have just let Ash Ketchum capture my wild Pikachu in a parking lot.
I broke her handcuffs. I feel like an animal.
Why does my car smell like burnt toast?
I take it you don't remember trying to make grilled cheese with your cigarette lighter...
Randomize
