I just sold weed to a guy holding a baby...does this make me a bad person?
Missed another period
I almost hope you're pregnant, this is unfair.
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
We should have a bouncer at the top of our stairs asking the guys we bring home for ID...
As I was about to go to sleep he asked me if I was ready to 69. HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK AT HIM IN THE FACE OVER DINNER TOMORROW
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
I've learned life lessons in Vegas. Mostly, drugs are cheaper than alcohol.
Is being in jail an excusable absence?
We just broke my bed mid-sex, laughed, then continued. If that isn't true love I don't know what is.
I'm pretty sure he's playing the harmonica in my shower right now. I just really need to pee.
What do you take me for? I'm not trying to lure you into bed with stories of my dead aunt.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
someone commented on last weekends photos impressed that so many homeless people wanted to take pictures with us. weird that those "homeless people" are our friends... right?
Randomize
