I realized today that I should stop thinking so much with my vagina instead of my brain.
Please tell me this doesn't mean another "surprise road trip" where I spend all my money on gas and the SURPRISE destination is the abortion clinic.
But what if I pay for the gas?
im in Michaels with rachel and i see a little boy jumping around and waving a rainbow pompom. Welcome to our team little one
imagine playing with puppies while we're drunk.
Like... we could film it and put like, "do you believe in magic" as the backround song and it would be complete joy.
Fat spanish girl grinding against air conditioner. ive seen everything now
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
Yep. How's your hangover?
It's like I fucked its sister and it's getting back at me.
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
im lying in bed trying to choke myself out because being awake hurts too much
she was puking nonstop out of the car window in the rain during our hour long drive back, we got lot of honks
tonight at the bar some people told me that I have a sprit following me around.. that's the kind of shit that you laugh off till you're home alone.
Her son walked in on us and asked if he could "wrestle too."
He met a girl at a stop light and managed to give her his number while driving down the highway.
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
Randomize
