we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
you googled "nude photos of celebrities you wouldn't expect to have nude photos", puked into the beer bong, and then laughed
I may or may not have puked in my RA's suggestion box.
The pregnant Hooters waitress told me to "make good choices".
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
I have no idea how I got home or why I am naked but I assume I owe you a thank you...
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
My car windows are covered in lube. Happy 4th of July!
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
He just didn't want his drunk dick pulled out of his windbreaker at the family party
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
so you might not believe this but he made a powerpoint. and gave you a 3.5/10.
Randomize
