I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
Dude... Hand job in the lake... It was as weird as it sounds.
The fact that I woke up with my panties on the counter and a piece of pizza stuck in my sheets is what scares me.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Jail is not for me. They portion control your meals and I don't really like that.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
i got up, ate a McDouble, then went straight back to bed.
You sure know how to make a day worth living.
We walked in and someone handed her an unopened bottle of jack with her name on it. She's like a drunken celebrity.
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Thou shall not get drunk and hit bitch cup in pong and take shirt off while wearing a see-through lace bra again
I had my first "Damn Kids/When I Was That Age" rant at work today. We need to drink this feeling out of me. NOW.
You're the third Mark I've fucked in that bed.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Everyone has seen your nipples. It's like asking if they ever walked on grass. You need better hangover questions.
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