Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
He's like a perfect storm of amazing hair and horrible judgment.
Why are you always at the walk in clinic, Lady Chlamydia?
You're not allowed to make that my permanent nickname.
Apparently I'm at the point in my life where I can wake up with a dick in my face and then go back to sleep
That penis will go down in history. It's the Helen of Troy of dicks. I will conquer it and the tale will live on for future generations to learn from
Great way to live...just blowing loads on upholstery
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I'm so confused as to where the sexual euphemisms end and the drinking starts
so much tequila, so little girl.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
Its not that hard to understand he's my holiday boyfriend, we ignore each other most of the year except on holidays when I give him head
I may just have to resign myself to life in flats. He's a sexy little chipmunk that worships me.
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