how is it that boston is so bitchin and the rest of massachusetts sucks so much?
how is it that you still think "bitchin" is an acceptable term anymore?
How does she give head with a nose like that? It looks like she has a plantain stuck in the middle of her face.
I think I know how big ted kennedy's penis is.
Her dress is practically falling off. It must know I'm here.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
when im done with her im going to need you to carry me on your shoulders as i poses victoriously for all those who were within earshot
What's worse: not calling my parents in Dallas to make sure they're alright or not taking shelter to masturbate all over my douchebag roommates clothes?
I worry about you.
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
We used a snorkel as a funnel. Can you say desperate?
I left the office with a vacuum, 2 condoms and 300 dollars cash money. Tell me I don't have the most versatile job on the planet.
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
I really appreciate you taking the time to blur out my excessive boob cleavage for instagram
Randomize
