Are you guys doing anything tonight?
Krysta
i fell off the bed in the middle of it, and he yelled "5 second rule" and kept fucking me. i think im in love
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
We should see who can shotgun a beer faster over iPhone FaceTime
Everytime I know she spent a lot of time on her hair for one of our dates, I intentionally cum on the top of her head. That's how she knows I pay attention.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
I KNEW IT. I HAD A FEELING. THIS IS GODS CURSE. BREAK UP WITH A SEX GOD. GET ONE OF HIS PEASANTS.
As a Chick-Fil-A employee, I think you'd appreciate the visual of me almost accidentally pulling out my wallet with a thong hooked on it as I payed for my waffle fries just now.
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
I am having the most awesome nonsexual conversation about my vagina right now
Stealing, and booze. If only you added meaningless sex with random people you would have wrapped all your life passions together
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
his mom called during sex and he made me talk to her I think we're getting serious
Listening to The Little Mermaid soundtrack should cure my drunkeness right?
Randomize
