sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
dude on moped wearing crocs...somebody get this guy his man card back
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
My room should be renamed "Land of the Misfit Condoms."
i just feel like the statute of limitations for admitting i plowed through her car last night was up a couple hours ago
We just had a 30 min argument on the actual birth date of Jesus, it ended in my brother and ain't cursing each other and an 8 yr old answering it by using Siri.
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I was just shot with a dart gun by one of my coworkers while walking to the printer. Ironically I was printing my resignation letter...
He just used the word frick. Is that a possible red flag?
Apparently, Lolla sends you an email every time you use your wristband to buy a beer.
21 new emails...yikes
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
Matched with the lumberjack. Here's your wedding invite.
You peed in a public fountain and then felt bad so you put dish soap in it; 4 ft tall bubbles.
How do you feel about a threesome?
Will you be there?
I'm the one asking!
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
Randomize
