I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
you spent the night getting lap dances from a stripper with a c-section scar then ended up at a one room casino by the airport and you say you're too good to blaze and see pirahna 3d? bullshit
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
the bar told me i would have to take an hour break so they could wash the shot glasses
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I bought a 9 dollar purse from payless so if I throw up in it tomorrow, no biggie.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
I might as well rub my vagina against it before I throw it away.
you left the hospital looking like the grudge, your mom and I were pushing you in a wheel chair and you yelled peace out fuckers.
Now I have the walk of shame to give the receptionist the bathroom key back, I've had it for 20 minutes. I should just smile and wink. She knows what went down.
I think we've entered a low point in our relationship when I'm sending you pictures of pubic hair designs "because they're funny"
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
Randomize
