I dont kno what was worse. Waking up 2 a guy next to me thinking I got blackout or realizing it was your boyfriend.
My feet smell like cheese. Makes me hungry.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
its whatevr the fuvk you could ever want is wht it is. i dont wanna read. literacy? overated in my opinion. overated.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
Winning the lottery was the best thing that ever happened to my penis.
Greatest pickup line ever: "We are out celebrating winning the lottery."
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
Nothing like ripping open the box with your keys on a sat R train and throwing back the morning after pill with some coconut water on my way to work at a fitness studio for free
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
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