a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
Just took a final in the room where I lost my virginity. I think it was god luck.
What a good family we'd make, him and I and our kids and his good dick.
Oh btw I took the eighth out of the plastic wrap so I could use it to wrap my red pepper. This can be seen as either pathetic or resourceful.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Just used my boobs as a ramp to guide ramen into my mouth.
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
BTW waking up to a picture of you taking a shot of what I can only assume was shitty lukewarm liquor out of a blow up dolls butt made my day
Yeah, you're right, it's a conspiracy against you. This small tight knit group of people who don't like assholes.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
I had a really bad dream about us drinking this weekend. Remind me to tell you Friday when we start drinking
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
THEY HAVE BEEN GOING AT IT FOR 2 HOURS AND I HEAR THEM BANGING THIS IS BULLSHIT
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize
