don't wear any deodorant. we have to do everything we can to sabotage this wedding
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
You know you're a nerd when you lose track of how many times you've gotten turned on watching Glee.
if you want blown tonight you're gonna have to take me up on that offer now. in less then 45 minutes you're gonna be blacked out and i'm not doing something i'm not getting credit for in the morning.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
the night ended with taco bell and tears
My night ended with a French cab driver offering me his sperm free of cost.
Come to Des Moines on Saturday, handcuff yourself to me and drink a bottle of vodka
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
I think after tonight I'm 85% lesbian
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
Dude.. She just busted into my house wearing a ski mask, a poncho, and thigh-high pink hooker boots and yelled, "THE CABS ARE HEEERRREEE!!"
Ohhhhhh, that night......I need to stop drinking, almost all of my conversations that take place Wed thru Sun after 8:30 are one blurry haze.
Do dollar stores sell vibrators?
Randomize
