no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Hey guys, just to let you know, I have a boyfriend...so that hookup was kind of a one time thing.
was that a mass text??
I have to collect my sorority sisters from greek row... I hate how being dd is a night and morning job
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
She said she was jealous that i could wear headbands, then growled at the ground in shame..
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I walked into my room last night at 4 am and there's a random dude in his boxers eating oatmeal on my futon. I looked at him and went to bed
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
You made the lady who made your cheeseburger sign the box so that when she got famous you would have her autograph.
We've been taking shots, cranking Marilyn Manson, and eating your bacon. Your kid is probably ruined.
Apparently I was carrying around a bottle of listerine calling it 5 loco
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