Don't cheat on me with the blonde bimbo religi freak
I wouldn't touch her with a ten foot pole
She's blonde
I chugged a bottle of robotussein and i ducking saw a blind lady on a purch sewing a shirt! And a tree portal
there should be a rule- if you jizz on it, you wash it
'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
I feel so grown up. I just went to home depot to buy actual home improvement supplies instead of stuff to make a bong with.
Also, I've sobered up around 5am, in Delaware. I remember making this decision, and highly regret it now.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
So in Aca Taco on grad night 1am, this bitch walks in alone drunk as fuck in her gown to the front of the line and says, "I graduated today...thank YOU"
Cat. Why do you sit on things I need to use.
Because it is cat.
And then we made magical love in his room under a blacklight as his roommate and girlfriend argued violently in the living room
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
i had to call him over, it was my last chance at getting some tonight
HE HAS A RESTRAINING ORDER AGAINST U!!!
it expires tomorrow
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
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