just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
She asked the class if starwars was based on a true story...
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I swear a good massage is the easiest way in my pants.
Not that there's a hard way... but you know what I mean.
i dont understand blimps. what would happen if they collided would they just bounce off or fall to the ground.
dude how high are you right now?
do you think jeeves would know? you do it. ask jeeves.
I spent most of the night convinced it was my birthday. But I was probably wrong, it can't be January, can it? I'm 90% sure its not. But maybe. The days have got shorter. Is this what unemployment feels like to everyone?
I feel like I took a shit on my life and you're rubbing my nose in it.
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
On a side note Tyler is buying beer from a gas station in a panda suit priceless
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
I literally just rubbed my stomach and told my liver to "hang in there baby"
I just felt emotion and I'm not okay with it
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
Randomize
