he came faster then a bring it on movie goes to dvd
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I never thought I would say the free bottle of grey goose was the problem but it was
My stomach is revolting cause i have put food in it and no alcohol.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
A beef tasting is not what I needed while hungover
We got stuck in traffic in the tunnel while we were smoking weed. We were afraid to air out the car.
A party without a piñata is not a party I want to attend.
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
If youre worried about being stabbed, you probably shouldnt be there.
Riddle me this: why did I wake up next to a stuffed sword fish?
Randomize
