We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
so after the bed broke we walked out of the room to a standing ovation
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
I saw you eating fruit and doing shots off people passed out
I'm too afraid that I'm 1. Banned or 2. Gonna be noticed by the lady bouncer I punched.
I mostly enjoyed dancing with him because his boner was scratching my bug bites.
He got thrown out for leaning over the bar topless and pouring himself some beer while singing the james bond song
I would have been the big man on campus...just flop my wang out on the table and how them what they were gonna deal with if they dropped the soap
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Broken leg sex is fun because I just get to lay there
Cum just came out of my nose. That is all.
Randomize
