there are too many children here to make this hangover-friendly
Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?
Bought two parrots for us. I'm keeping them at the Bellagio.
Question: rebounding with your exboyfriend over your rebound guy is healthy right?
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
Next Halloween I want us to dress up as jockeys, get drunk, and ride a carousel all night until we throw up or declare a winner
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I just fucked her in the corner of an ally while holding a large pizza waiting on a pledge for a ride.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Life without a bra equals bliss.
Congrats you've received dick pics from an Olympic silver medalist
FYI bail money is still in my drawer. I know you have no car but you need to know this for tomorrow.
Randomize
