And just as he was about to come, he screamed "Oh Christy!!"
What's wrong with that? Your name IS christy.
He then said, "Oh shit, sorry Julie."
What happened last night?
You soiled yourself again and told everybody that you'd given birth.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
I'm drinking a margarita out of my 'best bj' trophy and it tastes like victory.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
your mom just called me and asked me why i'm not in jail with you right now.
I'm sitting at my desk looking through our payroll system photos to find my next boyfriend. Abuse of power or awesome?
Dad just showed up on someone else's golf cart, filled an ice chest with booze and left while yelling "SHINANIGANS!!!!" this is going no where fast.
He really thought ahead and just left the tequila in the mail box for late night pickup. Best. Friend. Ever.
So much rum. So many feels.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
Seriously, though. As long as it's attached to you and is not a vagina, I will not be disappointed.
Is it awkward to pay for your boob job with scholarship money? Either way, it's happening.
I'm about to do something based solely on the fact that a fortune cookie told me to. This may not end well.
I woke up naked in a tent. I was more upset that the air mattress had deflated.
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