Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
I hope mine doesn't look like that
If you're missing hair this morning, i'm sorry in advance
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
Nothing ruins a good sext like too many emoticons
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Shame tastes like burnetts and latex
I just blurted out "it's pretty tight isn't it"
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I taped a pair of scissors and a coupon for a waxing on the door. He gets to choose.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
I had to ask him for a dick pic. Do you know how refreshing that was?
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Randomize
