It's more exciting when they aren't single....and even better when you have to pretend that you just slept with their roommate while trying to do the walk a shame as their girlfriend comes marching into the apt.
Im not the least bit jealous of the life you lead.
CONFIRMATION: i wiki searched it and Justin Bieber is 15 not 13. so i dont feel like as much of a pedofile now....
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
I dont know, my roommate got arrested but I'm gunna get some tacos no matter what
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
So our 'date' consisted of getting drunk off champagne at four and photo-bombing the shit out of tourist's pictures all over the city. Thoughts?
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
watched two friends get underages. one had a shirt on that said lets get wasted while the other said to the cop "i understand your just trying to do your job but that was dirty bro".
She told me a motorboat isn't successful unless they come out gasping for air. MISSION ACCOMPLISHED!!!
There are reggae songs being written about me...where have I gone wrong in life?
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
So, I gotta figure when the nurses at the emergency room noticed my new hair cut it means I'm there too often, right?
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