Im wearin a dollar bill hat and tgkin a big girl home. Lifi is gmwnd
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just traded a samurai sword for some drugs. It's gonna be one random ass night
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
The molly dropped while I was taking a shit. Do you have any idea how scary that is?
That does not seem like timing
I just had the most intense bikini wax of my life, i felt like i needed guardrails
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
Honestly at least you're not debating on whether or not you need to take plan b. But I can't because I spent all my money on pizza.
I made a powerpoint to trip to.
you are so studious.
Randomize
