If i come over, it means nothing
I may be a little high but I'm pretty sure my alphabet soup has only Os in it
We call that spaghetti Os
Note to Self: No matter how horny, turned on or in the moment you are, never go down on your gf after she had soccer practice.
she gave me one of those friendship bracelets and said as long as I wore it it was like an all-access pass to her vagina
its likemy ribs anf my hesrt aew cuddlingn
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
This girl looks like an elf and is obviously on coke. I want to be her.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
Well, if it makes you feel any better I'll be drinking tequila and doing lines on Halloween. Just like old days.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Dad hid the hash somewhere in my room and wont tell me where it is until i clean it. My room is spotless. The hash was on the ceiling fan...
Didn't know my clit could produce that many orgasms in one night. Fuck my husband; think I might have to become a lesbian.
Randomize
