I'm putting on too much make up bc I'm stoned
Can someone please explain to me how I got rugburn on my tits?
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
I drank mimosas and played bocce ball in the middle of finals week...now i know how Comm majors feel all the time.
I probably shouldn't have slept with him. I feel like that may have given him the wrong idea.
I don't think blacking out in class is a good idea. But I'm game
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
my nipple ring is gone but someone was nice enough to replace it with a paperclip
He's had mdma poured down his throat. He's getting huggy.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
had a dream that i inhaled my pet bird and started choking. Then I tried smoking from a bong and suddenly I smoked myself inside out. this is what happens when I don't smoke weed. my brain can't function!
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
also I have no idea whose underpants I'm wearing right now but they're super comfy and I'm not giving them back ever
So I realize somewhere between mildly irritated and outright belligerently pissed is where you are, but as to location, where are you?
Randomize
