And my dad told him he was a great looking guy. and then added "no homo" after.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I just threw up a christmastime peep. I am literally already sick of the holidays.
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Balls are wasted. Waste are ballsted. Ballsd wasted
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
I was so stoned on the way to work, I pretended you were in the car with me. We sang "Mrs. Jackson" by outkast.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
She came 4 times, called me a god, then made me breakfast. I don't think she is ever going to leave
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
The only people who will bring me pizza or tacos want a commitment and I'm hungry for food not their love.
I feel like I should have held a press conference. The state of my vagina
what color bed sheets say meditative warrior but also welcome to my sex dungeon...
navy blue
The fact that you have an answer to that is why we are friends...
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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