we have officially lost it.
He's married, but his wife isn't my neighbor so I don't feel bad about coveting him.
yeah. then i thought it would be a good idea to show them how hairy my armpits were, so they'd be distracted from the bush in my pants. EPIC FAIL.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
If you know any fat girls who would pay me for sex, I am low on money and morals right now
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
Good idea. You gotta take care of your vagina. She takes care of you. Pay it forward.
I'm like five sips away from making a Craigslist post for true love and mustaches. My family is going to disown me tonight.
Who gives a hand job to a 19 yr old one night then the next lets a 31 year old random man fly a plane to town and pick u up and take u to dinner?
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Just watched a middle age white woman scream WHY DON'T YOU GO FUCK YOURSELF, HELEN?! Helen seemed absolutely scandalized.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
He's on the porch naked. Help.
I love that they love me even though I might not exsist, its kinda like Im God.
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
