dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
What can I expect? While all of my friends are getting married, all of his friends are tripping on robitussin
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
I hope there's a soldier with a Bedazzler just going to town right now.
You missed lesbians having sex in the bathroom and the whole bar clapping for them. I had to do recon. It was amazing
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
I think the blind guy i flirt with on a regular basis is starting to realize he's old enough to be my father. I can't tell if he's into it or not.
There is a fake eye lash glued to one of my balls.
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
Sorry I didn't have my phone all night. Did we hang last night?
You bit me
Oh lord I need to hear this story
Randomize
