He looked like the mexican version of Steve Carrell with a unibrow.
And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
I must say, I don't like the act of throwing up, but the feeling after is quite delightful
so I think I'm done having sex with her, she's way too crazy
what about the blowjobs for adderall?
no those are still okay
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
Who would have thought the night we were surrounded by 4 cops would be the most responsible night of the week.
I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
my self respect just called, its having a good time without me
Apple should advertise that their phones are puke-proof. They would appeal to a whole new audience.
I've given up for the day already. I just wanna eat cheesecake and hide from her.
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
Germany has fetish clubs for everything. We are going to Germany. Germany is our friend.
If the ex isent in town and im crying under a table somewhere because of it can we go to a drag show or something
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
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