I'm so hungover And my mouth is so dry it feels like my tongue is wearing a sweater
Adam has been drinking
Who has his phone
Adam does
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
so for future reference,at what point did you feel like a line had been crossed?
lady crackhead wearing pjs and a santa hat brushed the snow off my car at 7am saying "free of charge" the whole time
I think I just puked all over my comforter and my roomdmate won't wakt up to washc it for me
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
If I EVER think it's a good idea to blow someone who just showed me their synchronized swimming performance on youtube again please correct me immediately.
Is there a special protocol when the stripper has a Boba Fett tattoo?
And please let him know I don't normally go off on long rants about feminist theory. That was totally the vodka talking.
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Oh god it's open bar.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
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