Braces and a neon one piece. She looks 15.
i'm in love
Who was that guy you went home with?
Hang on, I'm trying to ask his name right now.
I'm now in all their contact lists as "Pee-Pee Hands"...
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
she gave me head while wearing a sombrero and told me it was her "welcome to south of the border" blowjob. i am never leaving mexico.
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
So I think my aunt and her one legged boyfriend are getting it on in the next room. Traumatized does not even begin to describe what I am right now
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
He stopped me mid blowjob and asked me to take off my hat. He said it made him feel like Neil Young was going down on him.
I woke up with an empty beer bottle in my slipper and a note that said "it just wants to be warm"
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