I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
Sometimes I wonder why.. Then I realize I can't fool myself with that question bc we all know it's bc of his enormous dick
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
I need to find more Xanax, my Grandpa doesent leave for another week and he's made it a mission to get me to come out of the closet as a xmas gift to my parents.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
bring the dog... nobody goes to jail with a dog.
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
I woke up surrounded by goldfish. Thank God my laptop was here too. Now I don't have to leave my bed all day.
The cop was yelling at you as you layed on the sidewalk and you wouldn't take him seriously cause you thought it was some dude in a cop costume.
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I'm graduating college in 4 days. I already miss the bad decisions
Well, I hope you're having fun. I'm just gonna lay here and wait for death - shouldn't be long now.
I'm having to shit out rocks
His nipple licking is glorious
Randomize
