I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
I had 4 margarita's and 2 mixed drinks and i blew zero's. Its a cinco de mayo miracle.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Did I show you my penis last night?
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
So I realized I was officially over him when I was getting a lap dance on the keg bus at 3am from his old boss and I was double fisting:)
Legitimate logistical question....how did you pee in your duct tape dress?
she never specifically said NOT to fuck her boyfriend so technically we can still be best friends
Would it be appropriate to cancel a hookup to watch the golden globes?
absolutely. tina fey and amy poehler trump everything.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
He sent me a pic of her engagement ring and then STILL asked for nudes.
I just want the relationship Bob and Linda Belcher have- is that too much to ask?!
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Would an open wound count as good sex or bad sex?
Well, fuck this election. I'm getting drunk, regardless of who wins.
Randomize
