the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I hope mine doesn't look like that
you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
Remind me to tell you the one about the cashier that wouldn't sell me Jim Beam and NyQuil.
I swear there's a gravitational pull from your vagina to large groups of men in uniform.
I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser. I will not fuck this loser.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
Tell me why I woke up spooning a hamburger like it was a teddy bear.
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I just bought a blender and 120 pizza rolls. Bring tequila.
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
drinking vodka out of a wine glass to feel a little bit classier about myself.
screwing the intern at work sucks when u find out the boss is too. She is a smoking hot though
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