im so horny i just used my electric toothbrush to masturbate. god help me
I woke up covered in my own vomit with a pocket full of napkins. I guess I knew I would need them, but was not coherent enough to use them before passing out.
I need Christmas break to be over. I'm tired of fucking my old High School girlfriends
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
Caught my drug dealer jacking off. I think this is a new step in our relationship
I don't know what you told him but please make him stop telling me about his new video camera and winking
Either call me back or tell me you're in jail. For fucks sake. If this is a cop, just help out. national league.
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
I feel like my uterus is decaying in my body
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
I yelled out "blow jobs!" in my macroeconomics class. Ask me more about how my life is spiraling out of control.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
It still amazes me Mike had to have neck surgery after eating me out so much.
Randomize
